What To Talk About On A First Date and What Topics To Avoid

Here’s the deal when it comes to dating and attracting men: first things first, if you’re really interested in creating a fun, fulfilling dating life, and in meeting quality men who are fantastic to be with, you’ve gotta let go of the idea that you’re out to find ‘The One’.

This is something that many women forget. And here’s what happens when they do.
Instead of going on a date with the intention of simply having fun and seeing if the two of them even get along with each other, they show up all ready to bare their souls and ‘come clean’ about the ‘mistakes’ they’ve made in the past because, if they end up ‘together’ with this guy, he’s going to need to know this stuff about them.

Look: here’s what you’ve got to know.

1. Don’t bring up negative stuff straight away. Lead with the positive.

2. It’s a good rule of thumb to wait at least four or five dates before bringing up anything even remotely ‘heavy’ or personal.

3. It’s great to be honest when you’re in a serious relationship, but negative personal revelations have no place in a casual dating relationship.

4. You don’t have to feel bad about ‘concealing’ anything. You’re not concealing anything. Access to personal information about you is the exclusive privilege of those people who know you well. Casual dates are not eligible for this privilege, nor should they be.

5. If you are planning on revealing anything personal about yourself, don’t make it into this big heavy ‘event’. Be brief, don’t get emotional or messy, and focus on the positives: it was a challenge at the time, but you’ve overcome it now and moved on. Next topic of conversation!

6. It is absolutely necessary to be open about things that could harm or otherwise affect your date: for example, if you have an STD, you must tell them before you have sex. Use your common sense here.

7. If you have an ongoing messy and difficult situation in your life that you know will probably affect others’ perceptions of you, you’re most likely going to need to overcome that situation before you create a great dating life. If not, your other options are to conceal it from those you date (hmm, not great), or to be open about it after a few dates and just see what happens. However, remembering that quality attracts quality, and depending on the nature of the issue, don’t be surprised if most of your dates don’t come back for more.